Striding confidently amongst the throng of lesser beings, the Consultant felt powerful, unstoppable and monstrously intelligent. In fact, to process the huge number of thoughts generated by zer superior intellect, ze wore a Supplementary Brainpak* strapped to zer abdomen.
A Six Sigma Black Belt in Stakeholder Engagement, the Consultant's double-mind was paralleling solutions to a problem so profound and complex that the Client had not even been aware of its existence until after it had been identified.
Problem? No! Unexploited opportunity: to design a paradigm-shifting framework of synergistic desilofication on behalf of the Client, Gigantico Unlimited.
The initial Scoping Phase was already underway: a mission-critical, enterprise wide Review of Core Processes, Procedures and Protocols. The top priority objective was to identify all de-bottlenecking opportunities impacting customer-facing touch-points across Gigantico's operations ...
* thanks to Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert for the Supplementary Brainpak concept.
** What's In It For Me (WIIFM)
NIGHTMERRIES: THE LIGHTER SIDE OF DARKNESS This so-called "book" will chew you up, spit you out, and leave you twitching and frothing on the carpet. More than 60 dark and feculent fictions (read ‘em and weep) copiously illustrated by over 20 grotesque images you wouldn't want to meet in a dark alley.
AWAREWOLF & OTHER CRHYMES AGAINST HUMANITY (Vot could be Verse?) We all hate poetry, right? But we might make an exception for this sick and twisted stuff. This devil's banquet of adults-only offal features more than 50 satanic sonnets, vitriolic verses and odious odes.
MANIC MEMES & OTHER MINDSPACE INVADERS A disturbing repository of quotably quirky quotes, sayings, proverbs, maxims, ponderances, adages and aphorisms. This menagerie holds no fewer than 184 memes from eight meme-species perfectly adapted to their respective environments.
FIENDS & FREAKS Adults-only Tales of Serpents, Dragons, Devils, Lobsters, Anguished Spirits, Gods, Anti-gods and Other Horse-thieves You Wouldn't Want to Meet in a Dark Kosmos: 4th EditionHAGS TO HAGGIS Whiskey-soaked Tails of War-nags, Witches, Manticores and Escapegoats, Debottlenecking and Desilofication, Illustrated