jargon in Copenhagen: a dialogue in zero acts

INDUSTRIALISED FIRST WORLD (to 'emerging countries'): Stop clearing your forests, mining your resources and building your factories. Digital televisions, personal motor vehicles, I—phones and microwave cookers will not make your people any the happier. Money can't buy you love. Trust us. We know from experience.

Emerging countries: Why must we stop? You people in the first world continue to enjoy the freedom to consume whatever you like. You do it, why should we stop?

Industrialised first world: Yes, we have done it. We have cleared our forests and mined our coalfields and fished our fisheries to exhaustion. But we can't very well stop our people from exercising their rights as consumers, can we?

The whole world is threatened. We're all in this together. It's too late for us to change our ways, but you emerging countries and economies have the opportunity to save us all. Don't do as we do, do as we say. It's up to you, in the emerging countries, to save the day.

Emerging countries: We must stop industrialising because you industrialised too much? We must stop economic growth because you grew too fast and now you can't grow any more? Your people are entitled to two cars in every driveway. Our people are not entitled even to clean drinking water. Our people must constrain their desires for the good of the planet, while you people continue your path of headlong destruction. Dream on!

postscript: The end is nigh.

What end? The end of the world?

Nah. Not the world. Just our species. The world will get on quite nicely without us, thanks very much.

I am optimistic and cheerful about the future---even if that future includes the extinction of the species. In fact, especially if that future includes the extinction of the species!

As a pantheist I believe the whole of reality is alive, intelligent and interested in what happens to me.

I believe there are more worthwhile things to shed tears over than the demise of a none-too-intelligent species on a nondescript planet orbiting an average star at the outer edge of a mediocre galaxy in one of the outlying suburbs of a rather ordinary universe. (Actually, the previous sentence was written for rhetorical impact, to the detriment of truth. Our galaxy (the Milky Way) is slightly bigger than average. Our universe is anything but ordinary, being the only one there is. Our planet Gaia is very far from nondescript. She is beautiful, and rare. It's true, though, that humans are a non-too-intelligent species. Can't win 'em all, I guess.)

Sit back, relax, and watch as the whole thing unravels. Join the voluntary human extinction movement. Yes it exists--google it and you'll see. Highly entertaining.


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Nessa said...

I like this dialog. Very entertaining and true. I am very sure Mother Nature would be much better off without us.

Flash Dancing

masterymistery said...

Nessa, despite the doom and gloom, you'd have to say we're living in interesting times. Personally I believe we have gone too far and it's too late to save ourselves. Others believe we haven't yet reached the tipping point, and there is still hope, theoretically anyway. Whatever the case, it isn't and won't be, boring.

Nessa said...

I agree. Times are very interesting.

Flash Dancing