the old curiousity shop

The gang were all there, in their usual spot behind the maintenance block at the south end of the school grounds. They were talking about good ways to commit suicide and Tom said injecting air into your veins cos that gives you a heart attack, and that's how Bruce Lee died but they never found out who did it though.

Then Piggy said eating yourself to death, like in that movie where they ate and ate and ate and the one dude got sick and starting farting until they forced him to eat mashed potatoes and then they all screwed these hot young babes with ice cream and chocolate sauce dripping all over them. ...

Fiends and Freaks

Continues in FIENDS AND FREAKS now available at Amazon.com

FIENDS AND FREAKS and serpents, dragons, devils, hell-beings, anguished spirits, anti-gods, gods and other horse-thieves you wouldn't want to meet in a dark cosmos ...

Three and thirty twisted tails so outrageous you'll split your belly open shrieking with satanic laughter, or your money back.

Immature content, adults maybe.

Now at Amazon.com!

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eBooks by Cosmic Rapture

NIGHTMERRIES: THE LIGHTER SIDE OF DARKNESS This so-called "book" will chew you up, spit you out, and leave you twitching and frothing on the carpet. More than 60 dark and feculent fictions (read ‘em and weep) copiously illustrated by over 20 grotesque images you wouldn't want to meet in a dark alley.

AWAREWOLF & OTHER CRHYMES AGAINST HUMANITY (Vot could be Verse?) We all hate poetry, right? But we might make an exception for this sick and twisted stuff. This devil's banquet of adults-only offal features more than 50 satanic sonnets, vitriolic verses and odious odes.

MANIC MEMES & OTHER MINDSPACE INVADERS A disturbing repository of quotably quirky quotes, sayings, proverbs, maxims, ponderances, adages and aphorisms. This menagerie holds no fewer than 184 memes from eight meme-species perfectly adapted to their respective environments.

MASTRESS & OTHER TWISTED TAILS, ILLUSTRATED: an unholy corpus of oddities, strangelings, bizarritudes and peculiaritisms

FIENDS & FREAKS Adults-only Tales of Serpents, Dragons, Devils, Lobsters, Anguished Spirits, Gods, Anti-gods and Other Horse-thieves You Wouldn't Want to Meet in a Dark Kosmos: 4th Edition

HAGS TO HAGGIS Whiskey-soaked Tails of War-nags, Witches, Manticores and Escapegoats, Debottlenecking and Desilofication, Illustrated

Lily Strange said...

That was excellent! Actually, I would have loved having a babysitter like Missus Em. I was a peculiar child who first read Edgar Allan Poe when I was six years old and used to get horror comics from my neighbor down the street and read them under the blankets with a flashlight even though then I would be afraid to get up and go to the bathroom.
You can borrow any phrase that I spew out that by luck manages to make any sense at all, of course. :-)